Author Archive

Too old to be cool too young to be Retro

Tuesday, April 24th, 2007

Frankly the title says it all. Let me relate to you all (the three people that read this) my little story of self awareness. There are teenagers alive today who have never heard of the Beetles. Okay, so its not a story. But its the truth. Now I am no classic rock pushing lunatic but come on… the Beetles man… Never even heard of them? I have always figured the Beetles fell into the same category as Shakespeare. You may not have ever read him but you sure as hell know who he is. It nearly as disturbing to me as way back in the nineties when there were 14 year old girls upset that I ruined the ending of titanic for them by telling them the ship sunk.

Not that I am comparing historical ignorance to the knowledge of a rock group but the impact of learning of said ignorance is similar. It may be time for Bowling for Soup to do a follow-up song called 1995. It could be all about me. When DID Nirvana become classic rock? Maybe its the Fatherhood venom rushing through my veins but I have a strange urge to sit Brodie down and tell him about the good old days when Transformers were metal and there was nothing cooler than a talking car with a swooshy light in its grill. There are children out there who think that Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are a cheap american ripoff of an Anime.

So what’s my point? I guess there is none but damnit I want to be retro! When I tell highschoolers that I saw Nirvana live they ask me where my walker is. I am definately not even close to being old. I think kids have just lost there generational depth. there I’ve said it. Teh inturweb has removed the need for adults to bore their children with tales of days long gone and therefore stopped the flow of wonderful Americana. So here I am protesting this by blogging….. yeah I’m done.

Preconceived Jackass?

Tuesday, September 19th, 2006

I continue to be amazed at life. I consider myself to be rather open minded and that while I can go off on tangents, and sometimes it is just plain fun to play with stereotypes and their place in society, I feel that I keep an open mind. Frequently my words do not match my true feelings but I also am under the delusion that I am amusing to others. Sadly a movie brought my opinion of my thoughts into question. Even sader is the fact that the actor in said movie is not what you would call samaritan. The actor is Johnny Knoxville. The movie is The ringer. Before I had seen the movie I was expecting an over the top comedy that went devilishly close to stepping over the line and perhaps danced across it once or twice. To be frank I was expecting something along the lines of Drawn Together. I was wrong. I was very wrong. When I mentioned that I had recently rented the movie a comment was made “[…] and how is that not exploitation?” I felt at the time that it was most likely a form of exploitation but not to the extent that it would first seem. the only reply i can make to that statement now is until you see the movie keep your mouth shut. Really, becuase you will most likely feel like an ass afterwards. I sure do.

The concept behind the movie is well known. I won’t go into detail about it. What I feel the need to say however; Is, that if after watching this movie, you still feel the disabled actors and athletes were exploited, then you are just as narrow minded as the individuals you believe you are protecting them from. Bottom line is they are disabled but not incapable. A physical handicap is NOT a mental handycap. And a developmental delay does not mean they are stupid or incapable of making a rational decision. It wasn’t until after I saw the movie and went into the special features that I learned that this was a Faralay (sp) brothers film. The same team that brought us Shallow Hal. This gives the film a very large credit in my book because nobody else in Hollywood seems to have the bravery and capacity to make a film that takes their subject matter and makes “fun” of it to the point where the ones truely being made fun of, are actually the people laughing at the supposed subjects.

In addition to this being a Faralay bros. movie it was also %100 supported and endored by the Special olympics. Infact many of the actors in the film were actuially athletes in the Special olympics. These actors were mixed with non-disabled actors seamlessly and if you did not recognize an actor from a previous film it was nearly impossible to tell who was really disabled and who was acting. Kind of like Something About Mary. People still think that the guy who played Wendel was really, lets be frank, retarded.

So please do me a favor shut the fuck up and watch this movie. But really watch. Understand that if you really feel this movie is exploiting the disabled actors that you are infoact even MORE of an asshole for not giving these people (and I MEAN people) the credit they deserve in being able to tell when they are being taken advantage of.

(Note this is not directed at anyone in particular and the individual I quoted just happened to say something that stuck in my mind)

I think I may losing your mind

Wednesday, August 2nd, 2006

I have recently been drifting in and out of what most people would consider to be rational thought. After having resurected my iPod using the “Drop and Pray” method I found myself listening to my whole playlist on random. This is an activity I highly discourage. Especially all of you out there who think reality is a Hoopy place to be. The opening cords were not familiar to me so I glanced at my much abused screen. I caught the name of the track and had what I can only describe as a temporary detatchment of my cerebral cortex. It turns out that I was listening to the MI2 sountrack. The specific track was named “Nyah” pronounced Nye-Ah. However I read this as Niii-ya (imagine a Pirate going nya-nya-nya) I found this so odd and amusing that I rather loudly repeated the word outloud as I heard it in my head. On a side note this all occured during my break at work and I had been sitting in the Hospital Cafeteria. Needless to say my sudden outburst caused a few heads to turn. As soon as I finished my outbusrt I realized the proper pronunciation of said song title. This then stuck me as incredibly amusing and I began to laugh at myself muttering Nyah (improperly pronounced) in between my bouts of laughter. I don’t think that it comes as a surprise that even more heads were turning a this point.

So I have come to ask myself why my mind seems to go on brief holidays and I have come to the conclusion that I am borrowing my sanity from some source. Or perhaps it is a time-share.  I am not entirely sure. All I know is that my credit seems to be running thin at the mind-bank. Come to think of it wasnt “Overdrawn at the Memory Bank” a really bad Sci-Fi movie with Raul Julia in it? Spending time as a fox as punishment for a crime must be strange. But then I would know if I was a dog or a cat. What the hell are foxes?!?! Hmm I think I am done imitating Chef Brian for a while. Back to floating around in a man made lake with a cooler of beer on a liferaft I suppose.